He wants sex all the time.. He gives up ranching to play his music. If he is, you will need help yourself. Because he worked stuff out and then did it. If anything happened to this marriage, I am not going to jump right out with that friend. We have two boys together. We’ve kinda stopped the chatting and texting but he’s always on my mind and I’m on his. I think you’ve got to be extremely brave and come clean to your husband. My husband loves me and wants our marriage to work. Now, Anne is the writer who convinced me to look again at cowboys, which was no mean feat. Come clean with your husband. He was my hero’s best friend and best man at the wedding. I have been married for almost 16 years to my husband and we have 4 kids. We have a very strong bond & attraction for one another, even after all these years. We have very little to no physical contact. I started marriage counseling with my husband. Honesty is the best policy. I know everything about him and couldn’t be prouder of what he’s overcome. He shows no empathy, he is never wrong and everything is my fault, he never apologizes, andvis manipulative. He seemed like a safe bet – but all of my decisions to marry him from a cognitive and pragmatic standpoint were formulated from lies. He made me feel loved, and he was a much more stable person, but I lacked any deep feelings for him from the get go. I'm consumed with guilt because I have fallen in love with someone else but I am married. This wasn’t what I was looking for! I suggest you start by reading my book ‘I love you but I’m not in love with you’. What “love” I did have for him was lost long ago, do to his horrible verbal, emotional, & mental abuse. The moment of realization, I just felt that I am into him as well. Let me explain what I mean, at the heart of your letter, there is a paradox. I had to give up my painting. It sounds like there are a lot of problems in your marriage and you need to talk about them (and your childhood too). We basically now just share a house ~ I have moved my bedroom downstairs (He is upstairs). We joke and we talk about serious matters. I have been unhappy for a long time but didn’t have the strength to leave my husband. I became suspicious of sone of things he was telling me so I pulled up past history. Where I am flawed thinks it’s besutiful. Sadly, your co worker is not the answer – he just adds another level of trouble. 4 years ago, he started to mistreat me, yell at me, and accuse me of looking at other men. I feel like I got married out of fear and met my just after we started dating. I’ve laid claim on that life in every way except in the way it matters.